Another monkey related incident has futher strenghtened my argument that all lower primates should be eliminated from the face of the planet.
This time an armed and dangerous lowland gorilla threatened thousands of innocent men, women and children across downtown Calgary. Apparently, said gorilla was waving a knife around, demanding banana daiquiris and the release of his "fellow simian revolutionaries". He then threw several handfuls of grass in the air, ate six grubs and fell asleep. Can you imagine what would have happened if he had decided to hold up a liquor store? A drunken knife wielding ape carousing around Calgary in a stolen 1979 Trans-Am!
Well alright, that's not exactly what happened. The gorilla in question did in fact have a knife, but he was still locked in his paddock (where he can safely be mocked by his erect standing cousins). The knife was accidentally left behind by a zookeeper after general maintenance. The gorilla picked up the knife and held it threateningly towards another gorilla before putting it down on a chair and wandering away.
Clearly this "zookeeper" is a monkey sympathizer and needs to be held accountable for his treasonous actions. I think a few months in Guantanamo Bay would do him some good. A little "enhanced interrogation" should let us in on the plans of those furry bastards! Let's get George Bush and Dick Cheney on the case!
Read the news article here.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment